Identity to Last

It seems in us is a need for identity, for self-definition, and separation. We want so much to be either associated or disassociated, known for something or as something, and called a certain way. A lot of this has to do with the ego, whose food is identity, and whose position is lost as we enter ‘the kingdom of heaven’.

In our relationship with the world of matter – including our own bodies as matter – we define ourselves by our relationship with its parts. Someone who owns a house proudly states “I am a homeowner” should it come up; someone who goes to school says “I am a student”. Most of the time, our communication to the world of matter is nonverbal, which can simply be driving your shiny 2008 car, which in some way identifies you (ie. you are better able to afford this car than someone else).

Identity can be an association with a religion, with a city, with a country, a race, a political party, even with a gender. In fact, from very early on, we learn how to display our identity as a male or a female. We dress our baby girls in pink and our boys in blue; we demonstrate the identity of the sexes to them as they grow up by involving them with the cooking or working on the car, playing catch, etc.

A lot of the time, identity is in not being something, or not associating with something, or in not thinking a certain way. And the ego comes in, wanting always to be right in either its choices or its non-choices, and points out the flaws of the other way, or points out the best points of our way. The ego feeds on being right.

Identity involves matter, and very rarely non-matter. Many have led themselves down long, dark, and even deadly paths finding much of their identity (and thus worth) in their physical appearance. We identity ourselves as beautiful and enjoy the attention that brings, but when beauty fades, that inner person is left to find something else to grasp onto for identity – or maybe it tries endlessly to never let the beauty fade (plastic surgery?). In our quest to identify with the ‘better thing’ (ie. strength instead of weakness), we go to great lengths to identify ourselves with strength. For the strong of body, spending hours at the gym, having large arms, toning certain muscle groups to maximize the appearance of strength. For the strong of mind, spending years at school or in personal study. If we identify ourselves with the weak thing, we either beef up the weak thing, or highlight our strength and make it stronger.

Not that this is all bad, nor an absolute (ie. not all guys who work out for hours on end have a self-worth problem). This is a commentary.

However, all the things we seem to find identity and self-worth in are temporary; they fade away. What wisdom is there in that? I think it is wisdom to strip away everything we identify with that corresponds to something that won’t last as long as we will – this includes assets, anything to do with our bodies, maybe even our relationships – and to start building again from that foundational core being that we are and add to it things of value and worth and duration.

Each of us is not a body, or a mind, we are a spirit, or some would call it a consciousness. What of you can observe the endless chatter of the mind? What part of you is that in there? What part of you doesn’t belong to the perceived or perceiving world? The world of matter is of the perceiving world, is related to the mind as the perceiver. And there is something deeper in, which is not perceived by the mind, but perceives the mind – the real you – the true existence.

At some point down the road, we get to a point of realization or revelation, when we become true sons of our Father, being like Him, when we can say ‘I Am’, which is how He identifies Himself. We can stop saying I am male, I am 25, I am a supervisor, I am 6 feet tall, I have a blog, my favourite colour is green, I drive a black Civic, I am Canadian, I am this, that, and everything else. I just am. I am. This is where we are going - the simplest, yet the most meaningful existence. It’s an identity that lasts forever.